Film

I'm in another photography class this semester, and thus, have now used film for the first time. And it ruled! I feel like it stripped the process down, and put some control and time back into my hands. I took my roomie Erika and her NEW PINK HAIR down to the lake where Coby and I had just been a couple days before. The gnats were out and the mosquitos were fearless, but she was a good sport and I got the shot I needed for my class. From there it was up to Cob and I to shoot off the rest of the roll! And I loved (most of) the outcome. Coby even learned a little bit whilst making friends with the cows.

The colors are finally changing up in the canyons and the clouds are coming in. I've been super appreciative of the hot weather though, full well knowing whats coming. Bittersweet, ya know? In other news, school has been off to a rocky start. Sometimes it's just hard. But now I'm back on track and feeling good. It sure helps when there are Taco Amigo peach shakes and movie watching here and there to help a sista out. I've also been training for the Haunted Half Marathon with my friend from work, Meghan. And we've been crushing it! Our long Saturday runs have been so great, and I've actually surprised myself with how easy it's been. So yay for working toward a long dreamed of goal of mine!

Other than the usual, that's life as of late.

Backyards and Such

Sundays are the best days.
And as a side note, don't let Little Caesars tempt you...
The soft pretzel pizza isn't worth it.

Ducks and Stars

(via lauren nassef)

I'm back! And here to put all of my blogging ducks in a row.

If only I could treat this like a Yelp review. Not that I've ever written one before. But it does have a certain appeal. I mean, don't you wish you could Yelp review your life on the reg? You could be as ruthless or as overly generous as you'd like without (much) backlash. Your experience is what it is: if you are happy, you are like in heaven happy. And if you are mad, you have every right to be mad as hell. And ready to take down whatever establishment allowed such angering within you. Hopefully I can steer away from those two extremes. But man, Yelp reviews am I right? In keeping with that theme, let me first begin this catch-up with the detached and relatively short, list-like review. Ratings to follow.

School ended. School started. Part time ended. Full time started. Sick for like, a month.
Coby left for an internship. New nephew. Still haven't cleaned my room.

And now for the hyper detailed and overly invested review!

Let's start with the sick stuff. Here ye here ye, being sick is the worst. What started off as a little cold turned into full blown ear infections, full four stage migraines, and a rather unnecessary but completely not fun ER visit. I felt exhausted, chubby, anxious, useless and just done. I was constantly rubbing my head and leaving it in my hands for the majority of the day. Don't mind that I texted my mother on Mothers Day of all days, begging her for guidance before just driving myself to instacare. I recognized the error of my ways, but still. What kind of daughter does that? Thankfully she, and everyone else, were so good to me. Even if it was just letting me watch Gossip Girl all night (roomies!) or forcing me to go to the ER via my mother's wishes (Coby!). I would show you the picture I took of my half smiling face when the migraine induced paralysis hit, but then I would die of embarrassment. Just know that a slurred speech causing British accent was also involved. Thus, I give the sick stage a whopping two stars. One star for the amazing support I was given. And the other for Blair Waldorf's second season hair. Well, five stars for Blair's second season hair. No stars for spending one night crying because I had to miss the Haim concert. And while I still have yet to finish cleaning my room after all of this sickness, I did finally put the sheets on my bed. So, another star for effort.

I've been back in the Sports Camps scene since January now, but things are really picking up with the summer now in full swing. The days can be crazy, leaving me feeling either exhausted or energized and ready to crash a dance or two. While I don't get to participate in the fun stuff anymore, I did take a trip back to the hospital with a hurt camper yesterday. And I gotta say, it was a good feeling when the staff remembered me. Especially considering how much time I spent there last summer. I also had a "moment" at the Cannon Center. Aka the buffet style cafeteria that I've been gorging myself at everyday. I was standing at the salad bar, patiently waiting my turn to make myself a salad that I know I will only have three bites of... And I just had this moment. Where I loved that salad bar. And everything it meant to me. It was my place! My moment! I feel like every time I see someone I only kind of know they ask If I'm doing "the Sports Camps thing". And I weirdly answer "yes!..." while feeling uneasy about their idea of this "gig" versus mine. But then, you guys, the salad bar moment! And this is where the whole Yelp concept makes this less weird... Anyway, the point here is that Sports Camps is great and supplies me with the greatest co-worker friends, a daily Rice Krispie, and the promise of pebbled ice. Oh, and some money. Four stars for Sports Camps! The fifth star has been withheld, due to the discovery that I am not a morning person. But working on it.

Speaking of food, Smashburger is underrated. Don't you think so? So are hot cars. I've never been more okay with not blasting the air conditioning than I have this summer. For now, at least.

And speaking of summer, Coby is gone for the rest of it. And while it has actually been totally fine, it would be a lot finer if Face Time worked for us. Before he left, he sang some Miley as the sun was slightly setting for a good seven or so minutes. That should hold me over for the rest of the summer, right? Also, before Coby left, he had a birthday and I had an anxiety attack. Which my mother has 75% convinced me is just a side affect of all of that time under the weather. I really hope so, because it would be nice to feel confident in social situations again. Especially after my embarrassing moment at the pulpit for Fast and Testimony meeting in church the other week. Said moment being, well, me talking. And just being up there entirely. Let's leave it at that. No stars, sorry.

And last but not least, I have a new baby nephew! Baby Blaine. My sister flew me out to Portland for the weekend to meet him and take some pictures and boy (ha!) am I so glad she did. He is the squishiest, tiniest, cutest little dude and I love him so. It also gave the the opportunity to cave and read Divergent on the plane. That said, now I'm comparing everything in my life to factions and personality traits and I CAN'T STOP. All the stars for my little baby love Blaine!

And now, for the Yelpified Blog Post Star Round up...
Coby gone - 1 Star. ER visit - 1 Star. Sick - 2 Stars. Work - 4 Stars. Baby Blaine - 5 Stars!
Blair's second season hair - 5 Stars! Cannon Center Rice Krispies - 5 DELICIOUS STARS.
This Blog Post - hopefully some stars?

Spring and Selfiez

Spring. Selfies. Big deals. Feels.

That's what I wrote down in prep for this post, and by golly that just sums it up perfectly. So let's get to it! Just when I thought winter couldn't drag on for any longer, Spring sprung and everything was right in the world again. The blossoms have brought color and happiness, the trees are now full and fresh... Bada bing bada boom, changes were inspired and I can truly say I've never felt more refreshed. Utah sure is beautiful.

First. I dyed my hair and I have a selfie progression to prove it. It might not look like much, but I never do anything with my hair. Like ever. The last time I even had a trim wasn't last Christmas but the Christmas before. My poor hairdresser was trying so hard not to let on as to how bad my ends were, and finally just told me the horribleness of it all. She was so nice and I now think of her as one of my new best friends in a weird "you saved my hair and thus my soul" kind of way. But you guys there is blonde stuff in it! A lot blonder than these pictures are letting on. And for the most part it's been wonderful. I have been going back and forth between loving it and hating it while mourning the loss of my long, dark, beautiful yet horribly ended hair. But that's only natural, right? I did feel pretty and sassy and special while Coby so graciously took these pictures so that's gotta be worth something. As a side note, I've had that shirt since 8th grade. Prooobbably time for it to go.

Second. I wasn't planning on saying anything here, but this is a blog isn't it? And life plans are kind of the hip thing to talk about on blogs, aren't they? So here it goes. I petitioned to transfer to the Illustration program here at BYU andddddd I got in! I am so relieved and excited and holy cow am I ever ready to start this new direction as an illustrator. I've learned so much from graphic design, the program here really does produce the best designers. So while I am sad I won't be one of them, I've known for a while now that it just wasn't what I loved. Typography and Youtube tutorials aren't really my cheese. And through the huge frustration that this last year has brought I've realized that I'm happiest when I'm drawing. And primarily drawing. When I'm physically laboring with a pen and pencil to solve the visual problems that the communicative arts are all about. So yes, I'm nervous and yes I'm excited and yes I am just so ready.

Third. I forced myself to invest in a new aux cable for my car this week and hallelujah sweet sweet Lana Del Rey is back on repeat and back in my life without having to awkwardly hold the cable in the most frustratingly, specific way possible to have only music playing out of the right back speaker in the car. End scene.

This post is a lot of mumble jumble.
But Spring is all sorts of magical for me this year.

Guacamole and Emoji Dolphins

(via)

Right now in my English Literature class we are reading Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde.  I've loved the discussion and thinking that class has allowed, and todays lecture was no different. I get caught up a lot in who I am versus who I think I should be. My image, my online image, my school work, my future work, my personality, how I interact with others, etcetera etcetera and it's interesting how I can be brimming with ideas or goals one minute and completely helpless the next. Learning how we as a society have progressed over time with our how we view the soul and inherent goodness and whatever else is so interesting. And hopeful. We will always struggle with the two sides of anything and everything, that's nothing new. But the potential power of control is very comforting. These are things I thought I already knew, but to have it laid out a little more clearly through the lens of Dr. Jekyll (or is it Mr. Hyde?) today helped me to understand. I came across this quote from Emile Hirsch a while back and thought it was fitting of this discussion and of me, "I think I've always been half out of my shell and half in. Sometimes I can be extremely wild and sometimes I can be extremely shy. It just depends on the day." Allowing those days of in and out and up and down is so vital, and a total "duh" moment. Alas, that is my Tuesday thought for you all!

On a completely unrelated note, Provo is covered in fog right now and I love it. I've also learned that guacamole is my favorite food (topping? dip? spread?) ever. Always extra please and thank you. 

What else? The other night Coby and I watched The Motivation, it's on Netflix if you want to see. It's about the top eight skateboarders in the world and their preparation for, and participation in, the Street League Championship in New York. They are incredible. People are incredible. I love my vans and skinny jeans like the next girl, but I am no means a sk8r chick and am only now wishing I were one. Coby and I watched the movie the night after he got home from a weekend in Vegas. Now we have spent our fair share of time apart (family trips, holidays, etcetera), but ever since Coby got an internship in New York for the summer (yeehaw! yay! hallelujah! go get 'em!) any time apart feels so dramatic. Well, I am so dramatic. I think he was gone for one, maybe two, days and I went into panic mode. With just the little things, like how many episodes of Newroom will he watch without me? And who will make me cookies and smoothies when he's gone because he's more domestic than I am? And who will hold my head and play with my hair while telling me that everything will work out like every other day? And who will text me reply emoji dolphins at night? Because I know with the time difference they'd come in the middle of the day and I am going to be needing them at night sooo... Drama. I was deeply missing him and it's a little discouraging knowing how distraught I was for literally no time at all when he will be across the country for the majority of the summer. In actuality I quite like being alone. I mean I love it. I need it. And I am more than excited for him. I just need to breathe a little bit. And remember that there are people out there that have to endure so much more for so much longer.

And to end all of this mushy mumble jumble, coolness in a video.

Lil' Tidbits

(via.)

+ The weather here is wonderful! Put me in a jean jacket and I'm happy.

+ I eat fruit snacks every day at work. This is also a happy thing that needs to be noted.

+ Lately I've been feeling so unmotivated. I crawl into bed the second I get home.

+ I exact-o knifed my finger last week and made a horribly-timed not very good joke about it in my design class. Like, a full minute past it's well-timed window.

+ Speaking of design. UGH! It's like I love it, but I'm not good at it. I have this block where I physically can not do it. And that's okay. Actually it's not okay, I'm just telling myself that it is. Which isn't very good.

+ I took engagements for a couple! It went so well! I did start off a little shaky, and there are a lot of things I would've done differently, but I am proud of myself. So just go right ahead and add me on to that everyone is a mommy-blogger-photographer list please and thank you. I will wear that badge with pride.

+ I skied with my dad the other week. It was freezing but so much fun. Towards the end of the day I took one mad tumble (tired legs, weird snow, caught an edge, my dad loves the double black diamond moguls and that kind of sucks for me, etcetera). Anyway I hit my head pretty weirdly and for the next four or five days I couldn't properly lift my neck. I felt like gumby.

+ I've been wanting to redesign this site for the last, oh ya know, year. It's such an eye sore. So then I say I'll post when it's done, then I never do, yadda yadda yadda. So here I am, posting anyway. So just be patient with me guys. And I will be patient with myself too.

+ I'm off to California for my new little niece Dolly's blessing! I miss my nieces so much. Hopefully I'll come back a little more refreshed. And with a little more motivation to get things done. Heaven knows I need it, ain't that the truth.

So all of this to say, hello and goodbye!

Jake and Lake and Cake

We went lake crazy. We didn't have cake though.
Wait! I take that back. We did have lemon poppyseed cake the next day.
 It ruled. The cake and the lake.